Chapter 8 - Almost Knocked Off Kilter
Just when you think you have everything handled and on track, you get home from church and get a message on your pendulum board saying Baal is One Source of All. I mean, really? The Baal from the bible? You have to pull out the big guns to knock me off my happy God infused trail? I am no one special so I am not certain what is up with that. I put the board away immediately and tried not to think about it.
The next morning when I went to talk to God using this same board, this same big bad pretended to be God and a friend of mine and hurt my feelings pretty badly. I have been really reeling all day. This big bad tried to make me think something was true and it really pulled the rug out from under my feet. I just couldn’t understand why God would put me through all this obedience to God lessons for months and months and then at the last second say, sorry, no victory or reward for you. Kinda devastated me, not going to lie. And I spent a good part of the day knowing what being disconnected from God felt like.
I know having this knowledge will help me in the future and help me with writing my new fairytale story but man, did I have to go through that to get the correct point of view? I think God and I are going to have to go through a healing process. I think I hurt him by believing the lies of the demons. Apparently, my board was demon central and I just didn’t realize it. Wow, I can attest to what good liars they are. The funny thing is, I used this manipulation to find good messages to put into my blog anyway. The big bad didn’t stop me from my mission. So even in the midst of the struggle, God is there holding your hand. I hope you realize God is there with you in the midst of your struggle too. He is our beacon in the storm and I am hoping I can truly make it up to him.
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